Archive Version of
Partners Task Force for Gay and Lesbian Couples
Online from 1995-2022

Demian and Steve Bryant originally founded Partners as a monthly newsletter in 1986. By late 1990 it was reformatted into a bi-monthly magazine. Print publication was halted by 1995 when Demian published Partners as a Web site, which greatly expanded readership.

In 1988, the Partners National Survey of Lesbian & Gay Couples report was published; the first major U.S. survey on same-sex couples in a decade.

In 1996, Demian produced The Right to Marry, a video documentary based on the dire need for equality that was made clear by the data from the survey mentioned above. The video featured interviews with Rev. Mel White, Evan Wolfson, Phyllis Burke, Richard Mohr, Kevin Cathcart, Faygele benMiriam, Benjamin Cable-McCarthy, Susan Reardon, Frances Fuchs, Tina Podlodowski, and Chelle Mileur.

Demian has been the sole operator during the last two decades of Partners.

Demian stopped work on Partners Task Force in order to realize his other time-consuming projects, which include publishing the book “Operating Manual for Same-Sex Couples: Navigating the rules, rites & rights” - which is now available on Amazon. The book is based on the Partners Survey mentioned above, his interviews of scores of couples, and 36 years of writing hundreds of articles about same-sex couples. It’s also been informed by his personal experience in a 20-year, same-sex relationship.

Demian’s other project is to publish his “Photo Stories by Demian” books based on his more than six decades as a photographer and writer.


Partners Task Force for Gay & Lesbian Couples
Demian, director    206-935-1206    demian@buddybuddy.com    Seattle, WA    Founded 1986

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Holy Union — II
© 2000, Partners Task Force


The following sample marriage ceremony solemnizes a relationship.

While this may not be reproduced by any print or electronic means for distribution, permission to use this text is hereby given to individual same-sex couples for use in their personal commitment ceremonies.

Gather and Greeting

Welcome

Presider:
Dear friends in Christ, we have come together in the presence of God to witness and bless the union of (first name and second name) in a lifelong commitment of love. The calling to live in the bond of a covenant is a gift from God, in whose image we are created and by whom we are called to love, to reason, to work and play, and to live in God and one another. In celebrating this covenant we are reminded of our highest vocation to love God and to love one another.

[Name1-] and [Name-2] are here to bear witness to their love for each other and to their intention to embody Christ’s love in their relationship. Each has found the other to be a gift of God in the midst of a broken world. We are now called to share in their happiness and to witness this exchange of vows, because we believe God, who is love and trust, sees into their hearts and accepts the offering they are making.

The joining of [Name-1] and [Name-2] in heart, body, and mind is intended by God for their mutual joy, for the health and comfort given one another in prosperity and adversity, and for the greater rnanifestation of love in the lives of all whom they encounter. Therefore this commitment is to be undertaken and affirmed seriously, reverently, deliberately and in accordance with God's intention for us.

Opening Prayer (Presider)

First Reading: (harp plays) A reading from the first letter of Paul to the Corinthians.

(silent pause)

Second Reading: A reading from the letter of Paul to the Romans.

(silent pause) (harp ends)

Reflection on why we are gathered (Presider)

Exchange of Vows

Person1:
In the name of God, I, [Name-1], take you, [Name-2], to be my companion and partner. I solemnly promise before God and those present that I will be with you always. I love you now and wish to grow with you … to challenge, as the years pass, how we love our God, each other and those whom God puts in our path. I promise to love you in the times of celebration and of sadness in times of pleasure and of anger, in times of sickness and of health. I will love you and honor you all the days of my life.

Person2:
In the name of God, I, [Name2], take you, [Name1], to be my companion and partner. I solemnly promise before God and those present that I will be with you always. I love you now and wish to grow with you … to challenge, as the years pass, how we love our God, each other and those whom God puts in our path. I promise to love you in the times of celebration and of sadness in times of pleasure and of anger, in times of sickness and of health. I will love you and honor you all the days of my life.

Blessing of the rings (Presider)

Rose Ceremony

Person1:
[Name2], I offer you this rose as a symbol of my love for you, a love that I will express by kindness, respect, trust and faith in you to the end of my life.

Person2:
[Name1], I offer you this rose as a symbol of my love for you, a love that I will express by kindness, respect, trust and faith in you to the end of my life.

Prayer of Gratitude

The Couple:
We would like to thank each of you for being an important part of our lives. We thank you for coming together to celebrate the public declaration of our commitment to each other. We extend an invitation to all of you to be as important a part of our tomorrow as you are of our today.

We would like to especially thank our families for the love and support that they have given us. I would like to thank my mother and father for their love and acceptance. We would like to remember all those who have gone before us and could not be here today to share in our joy but will always be present in our hearts, especially [Names]. We would like to thank our family and friends who are separated from us by distance, but have sent us their love and blessings.

Intercessory Prayer
(Presider invites the congregation to join in prayer.)

Presider:
That they will have a steadily deepening love, which grows in understanding and unselfishness; for this we pray.

Response:
Lord help them to grow in love.

Presider:
That they will have a measure of patience, especially in the early years when life must fall in step with life; for this we pray.

Response:
Lord help them to grow in love.

Presider:
Grant them the ability to communicate that they may be saved from hurtful words spoken in anger or grudges nurtured in silence; for this we pray.

Response:
Lord help them to grow in love.

Presider:
Bless them with a sense of humor, that they may laugh at themselves and with others; for this we pray.

Response:
Lord help them to grow in love.

Presider:
That theirs be a happy home, where they may find and give serenity and strength; for this we pray.

Response:
Lord help them to grow in love.

Presider:
Give them a sense of values, that they may care for people more than possessions, for giving rather than receiving, for loving rather than being loved, for understanding rather than being understood, for honor more than honors, for the dimensions of a home more than the details of a house, for your approval more than the world’s approval; for this we pray.

Response:
Lord help them to grow in love.

Presider:
Plant within them a growing faith, that finds your sufficient love and grace in every joy and sorrow and responds in lives of steadiness and service; for this we pray.

Response:
Lord help them to grow in love.

Presider:
Make them instruments of your peace; for this we pray.

Response:
Lord help them to grow in love.

Presider:
We ask your blessing upon them. In health and in sickness, in abundance and in want, in life and in death.

Response:
Lord help them to grow in love.

Circle of Blessing (all) (harp plays quietly)

Closing Prayer (presider)

Gifts to Family, Friends (the couple)



This vow courtesy
Dignity / USA National Office
1500 Massachusetts Ave. N.W., #11, Washington, D.C. 20005
800-877-8797; 202-861-0017; fax 202-429-9808
dignity@aol.com
www.dignityusa.org


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