Archive Version of
Partners Task Force for Gay and Lesbian Couples
Online from 1995-2022

Demian and Steve Bryant originally founded Partners as a monthly newsletter in 1986. By late 1990 it was reformatted into a bi-monthly magazine. Print publication was halted by 1995 when Demian published Partners as a Web site, which greatly expanded readership.

In 1988, the Partners National Survey of Lesbian & Gay Couples report was published; the first major U.S. survey on same-sex couples in a decade.

In 1996, Demian produced The Right to Marry, a video documentary based on the dire need for equality that was made clear by the data from the survey mentioned above. The video featured interviews with Rev. Mel White, Evan Wolfson, Phyllis Burke, Richard Mohr, Kevin Cathcart, Faygele benMiriam, Benjamin Cable-McCarthy, Susan Reardon, Frances Fuchs, Tina Podlodowski, and Chelle Mileur.

Demian has been the sole operator during the last two decades of Partners.

Demian stopped work on Partners Task Force in order to realize his other time-consuming projects, which include publishing the book “Operating Manual for Same-Sex Couples: Navigating the rules, rites & rights” - which is now available on Amazon. The book is based on the Partners Survey mentioned above, his interviews of scores of couples, and 36 years of writing hundreds of articles about same-sex couples. It’s also been informed by his personal experience in a 20-year, same-sex relationship.

Demian’s other project is to publish his “Photo Stories by Demian” books based on his more than six decades as a photographer and writer.


Partners Task Force for Gay & Lesbian Couples
Demian, director    206-935-1206    demian@buddybuddy.com    Seattle, WA    Founded 1986

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Marriage Equality Speech
by Governor Chris Gregoire
January 4, 2012


On January 4, 2012, Governor Chris Gregoire offered the following announcement which states that she not only supports legal marriage for same-sex couples in Washington State, but that she will present the bill itself to the legislature.

Gregoire’s announcement followed years of advocating for equal rights for gay men and lesbians. In 2006, she signed legislation banning discrimination based on sexual orientation in employment, housing and other areas. In 2007, Substitute Senate Bill 5336 created the state domestic partnership registry.

A year later, Gregoire signed House Bill 3104 which added additional rights and responsibilities relating to issues such as dissolutions, community property, estate planning, taxes, court process, conflicts of interest for public officials and guardianships.

Legislation signed in 2009 requires state agencies to ensure that all privileges, immunities, rights, benefits, or responsibilities granted to married individuals are granted to an individual who is, or was, in a state registered domestic partnership.

Today I stand before you as Governor of the state of Washington, and as a wife, a mother, a student of the law, and as a Washingtonian with a lifelong commitment to equality and freedom.

Today, I’m announcing my support for a law that gives same-sex couples in our state the right to receive a marriage license in Washington – the same right given heterosexual couples.

It is time, it is the right thing to do, and I will introduce a bill to do it.

Once again, the call for equality is sweeping through our nation – and this time it’s for our gay and lesbian citizens.

Make no mistake, America has been here many times before.

In our long, hard road for equality – history shows we have faltered but we have always fought hard when it comes to protections against discrimination.

We have made major strides towards equality for racial minorities, for women, for people with disabilities, for immigrants, for religious sects.

We applaud the generations before us for their wisdom and courage to fight for equality.

Now it’s our time — this generation’s call to end discrimination — discrimination against our gay and lesbian citizens.

It is time for marriage equality.

That means the State of Washington should not deny our citizens a marriage license based on sexual orientation.

For all couples, a marriage license is very important. It gives them the right to enter into a marriage contract in which their legal interests, and those of their children if any, are protected by well-established law.

Why then does our state deny a marriage license?

Some argue that the state should deny a marriage license to same-sex couples based on the premise that marriage is for procreation. Do we then deny a license to heterosexual couples who choose not to have children? To those who can’t have children or those who adopt? To those who have children through in-vitro fertilization?

Some argue that same-sex marriage weakens the institution of marriage. Is this a role of the state? If so, it has failed miserably with a divorce rate among heterosexual couples now at about 50 percent.

Some argue that the state must deny a marriage license based on religious beliefs.

With a marriage license, couples marry in civil or religious ceremonies.

In issuing the license, the state should not involve itself in an applicant’s religion.

The responsibility of the state is to license only. The right of a church is to decide whom to marry, and the state will honor the religious freedom of all faiths.

The arguments used today to discriminate based on sexual orientation should remind all of us of the arguments used to discriminate in the past, and specifically the laws banning interracial marriage.

It wasn’t until 1948 that the California Supreme Court became the first in the nation to declare such a law unconstitutional.

And the United States Supreme Court didn’t declare anti-miscegenation laws unconstitutional until 1967!

While we have worked hard to confront racial discrimination in our state, we have been on a journey to end discrimination based on sexual orientation.

Until 2006, Washington lesbian, gay, bisexual and transgender citizens were denied basic protections from discrimination.

It was that year that I signed a law banning discrimination based on sexual orientation in employment, housing and other areas.

A year later, I signed a law creating domestic partnerships for same-sex couples, along with a number of rights enjoyed by married couples. And the year after that, I signed a law expanding those rights even more.

Then in 2009, voters approved Referendum 71, which expanded the domestic partnership rights of same-sex couples.

It was a notable achievement in our long journey, but it still left same-sex couples with a different status. Some say domestic partnerships are the same as marriage. That’s a version of the discriminatory separate but equal argument of the past.

For decades, that argument was used to keep African-Americans separate at schools, apartments, and drinking fountains. After all, the argument went, those separate places were just as good. But we all knew separate is not equal and finally the law caught up.

While I understand the experiences of racial minorities and lesbian, gay, bisexual, and transgender Americans are not identical, laws that keep some Americans in a separate status are inherently unjust.

It is now time for equality of our gay and lesbian citizens, and that means marriage.

When someone asks me what marriage means, I don’t think about the legal protections of a marriage license. I think about love, commitment, responsibility, and partnership.

Same-sex couples should not be denied the meaning of marriage. They have a right to be equal!

Throughout our journey, an ever-growing number of Washingtonians have come to understand that equal rights for same-sex couples is not only a good thing, but the right thing to do!

It’s time to give our sons, daughters, brothers, sisters, aunts, uncles, friends, and the couple down the street the right to marry in our state.

Now it’s time for all of us to stand up for equality in Washington.

We have our champions like Sen. Ed Murray and Representative Jamie Pedersen. I stand with them.

I also stand with our younger Washingtonians. Is there a generation gap here? Is it time to listen to our young people?

Poll after poll show that young Americans – by substantial margins – support same-sex marriage even as their parents or grandparents struggle with it. Why?

Can it be that our children knew some kids on the playground who had two moms instead of a single mom, or two dads instead of a mom and dad?

Can it be because they befriended children of same-sex families – friendships that endure today?

Can it be that today’s young Americans see sexual orientation discrimination as just as unacceptable as my generation saw racial discrimination?

We must tell these children and their families that they are every bit as equal and important as all the other families in our state.

Finally, I stand in the memory of Cal Anderson – the late state senator who so humbly and courageously fought for civil rights in decades past.

Passage of the law would make Washington the seventh state in nearly as many years to grant same-sex couples the right to marry.

The first state was Massachusetts, followed by Connecticut, Iowa, New Hampshire, Vermont, and New York. And by the way, same-sex marriage is legal in our nation’s capitol, throughout Canada, and here in Washington by the Suquamish Tribe!

For many people, I know this is a very sensitive issue. I understand that. To those who fear it, I ask them to consider the fact that Massachusetts has permitted same-sex marriage since 2004 without the doomsayers’ predictions.

In fact, the people of that state are raising their children, coping in this economy, and working to make a better world, just like Washingtonians.

A special commission created by the state of New Jersey recently did a study about the potential impacts of same-sex marriage. It found that the economy of Massachusetts’ truly benefitted, and continues to benefit from the change in the law.

Among other findings, the study found that professional same-sex couples continue to move to Massachusetts, bringing their credentials, their children, and even extended families with them.

Same-sex couples have strong families, and have been raising happy, healthy children for years – right alongside other couples and single parents.

Our gay and lesbian families face the same hurdles as heterosexual families – making ends meet, finding time for career and family, raising their children and saving for college. And we are better for it!

They and their kids join us in our churches, our schools, and supermarkets. And we are better for it!

We need to ask ourselves, how would it feel to be a child of a gay couple? How can we tell these children that their parents’ love is seen as unequal under the law, that their families are different.

We must tell these children and their families that they are every bit as equal and important as all the other families in our state.

As Washingtonians and Americans, we have serious problems to address – a far-off war, the Great Recession, more than 13 million people looking for work, worldwide economic competition.

Loving, committed married couples of any sexual orientation can only help us. They can help us defend our Democracy, help our neighbors, and build strong communities. And they will.

Fellow Washingtonians: Throughout our history, we have fought discrimination. We have joined together to recognize equality for racial minorities, women, people with disabilities, immigrants, religious sects.

Please answer the call to support equality again in our great state. It is the right thing to do and it is time.

Thank you.

Governor Chris Gregoire
Contact Governor Gregoire
Olympia, Washington

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